My Body Is A Cage My Mind Holds The Key
by pathosical
Summary: She was alone, left with her own ghosts and the future the Replicators created for her. All Elizabeth did know was that she couldn't wait for a rescue that might not ever come.


**di·vide  
**_**–verb (used with object) **_**  
****2. **to separate or part from something else; sunder; cut off. **  
****4. **to cleave; part. **  
****5. **to separate in opinion or feeling; cause to disagree: _The issue divided the senators. _**  
**_**–verb (used without object) **_**  
****10. **to become divided or separated. **  
****12. **to diverge; branch; fork: _The road divides __six__ miles from here. _

Normally John's team would rescue her. Sometimes it would be Lorne's or, on the rare occasion, SG-1, expanding their heroics into the Pegasus Galaxy. One constant was that they would always be in a puddle jumper, with John it was always John looking at her, offering a timid smile, and then she would kill them all. John would be last, the smile would be gone, replaced with horror and disgust. With life fading from his eyes and with his last breath he would whisper, "I'm sorry."

Alone again, with their blood staining her pale skin, she would make no move to stop the jumper's final descent to the planet's surface. Fire would surround her, and she'd welcome it, for once being able to feel the pain that her nanites denied her. As her eyes began to dim, and darkness tuggedher, she'd breathe a sigh of relief. It was finally over.

Only her eyes didn't remain closed. When she woke it was with Oberoth standing in front of her.

_**30 Years Ago**_

_Sitting at the desk, the little girl couldn't help but fidget, her legs swinging back and forth until she felt her mother's firm grasp on her shoulder. "Elizabeth, that is enough." Before she could be chastised further her teacher came back into the room._

"_Mrs. Weir, thank you for coming."_

"_Of course, what exactly is the problem?"_

"_As I'm sure you know, Lizzie..."_

"_Elizabeth, my daughter's name is Elizabeth."_

"_Of course. Well, Elizabeth is a very bright child. Only she seems to be having some problems in math..."_

_As a little girl Elizabeth had always despised math, division in particular. Dividing one larger, complete number into separate parts. From one whole, complete part you'd end up with two different parts, fractured, separate, no longer complete, each missing something._

She was either drowning in darkness or burning in light. She felt everything or nothing. She heard every sound but not her own heartbeat. She was isolated from everything. Her only contact with the outside world was when they came for her. They never came only in the dark or only in the night, making it impossible for her to fear one and welcome the other.

She existed in a perpetual state of waiting, waiting for them to come for her, to die, to try and escape again, for this to be over. At times when she felt everything she couldn't even remember what she was fighting for, her own name. All she saw were blurred faces, which ran from her whenever she tried to make them clearer.

In her dreams she would wander through hallways. She felt as if she knew them, as if she'd walked them many times before. But now she was lost, and unable to get to where she was supposed to be. Everything just felt wrong.

At times, though, she'd catch glimpses of a clear crystal blue sea, and a feeling that felt almost like belonging would wash over her. Only then, she'd inevitably be jarred awake by the faint sound of her captors' boots, coming to take her once again. For her, life was the nightmare that she could never escape.

_**19 Years Four Days Ago**_

_In college, her father expected her to follow in his footstep. Her mother knew that she'd change the world, promptly marry a socially acceptable man and then give them grandchildren to dote on. They never thought to ask what she wanted, and by her the end of freshman year she was perfectly capable of admitting that she didn't have a clue. _

_The day her life changed was a dreary rainy day, with her roommate sick in bed. After listening to Becky bemoan how her hard earned C would vanish since she was in no condition to turn in her term paper, and after Becky decided to in fact turn in the paper herself, Elizabeth volunteered to take it for her. Ever polite, she waited for the lecture to end, not even noticing herself becoming even more enraptured in the speaker. By the end of the class she did remember to turn in the paper, and also jotted down that day's assignments, already planning what she would say. _

_Two hours later her own paper was done, her major changed, and she was calling her parents wondering if they'd like to meet her for lunch that weekend._

If she focused enough, she could make out the rhythmic steps of her captors as they made their rounds, checking the perimeter. For eighty counts she couldn't hear them. After the first step she could hear, it took five more for them to reach her and five more for them to disappear once again. The pattern was incessant and far too consistent for any human. Just another reminder that her jailers were not close to being human, as they were imitations of life, machines. And she was one of them now, unable to ever go back to what she once was. Then they came for her once again, to take her to Oberoth.

_The road to the rebel encampment was filled with potholes, and the jeep that had been provided for the team had lost a muffler on the way to the camp, or so she assumed given the loud bangs that the car was producing. Each bump, Elizabeth clenched her eyes shut, fully prepared for the jeep to fall apart beneath her. This was her first time in the field. Doctor David Roth, her advisor, had offered her a spot on his team due to the strength of her thesis. _

_She gazed out the window as they continued their slow journey through the dense jungle to the rebel encampment._

_Then the jeep lurched to a complete stop, and she her musings ended, as she was motioned to get out of the jeep. As she began to, she was surprised by Miguel's offer of his hand to help her out, for which she offered him a shy smile._

"_Now we walk the rest of the way," was Miguel's pronouncement. He was met with the disbelief of the other expedition members. Quickly Elizabeth picked up her own pack, and allowed herself to be led into only God knew what, ignoring the gnawing feeling that had appeared in the pit of her stomach._

_Her heart was pounding, as she raced through the jungle. She could hear the rebels behind her, and the clear sound of guns being fired. Soon the jungle became even more dense, so that branches were slapping her in the face, and roots were making her stumble. Somehow she was able to keep her footing and continue in the desperate race for her life. _

_A hand lurched out of the darkness and grabbed her, instinctually she was about to scream until the other hand covered her mouth._

"_Senora, silence," whispered Miguel. He guided her further into the deepest parts of the jungle. Only when the sounds of the guns became faint pops, did Miguel pause and, offer her his canteen._

"_The rest of the team?" she said._

_His eyes quickly avoided hers, confirming her fear that the rest of the team was dead. She tried to hand back the canteen, but instead of taking it, his hand cupped her face wiping blood from it. And they continued their march through the jungle. _

_For almost four days they were they able to stay ahead of their pursuers. On the fourth day Miguel's head suddenly snapped to the right, Elizabeth's quickly mirrored his movement, just fast enough to watch out of the corner of her eye as a large patch of red blossomed on Miguel's dirty white shirt. _

_She screamed, and this time there was no hand to silence her. His body slumped over her lap, and his dead eyes stared into hers._

A sharp scream broke the otherwise quiet night on Atlantis. Only as her senses absorbed the room she remembered that for her there was no Atlantis anymore, just the hell that the Replicators had trapped her in.

Looking around the room she caught sight of Oberoth, summoning up all her hatred she felt for him, every dream she had where she killed him, she looked at him, enunciating each of her words she spoke deliberately," I am not one of you, and you will never break me."

He visibly stepped back, quickly he regained control of his normal façade as he gestured for two of the others to take her back to her cell.

With renewed determination Elizabeth knew she had to escape from the Replicators, she couldn't afford to wait for rescue. She was alone, they had left her, and only she could save herself. Her body aching from remaining inactive, her mind still stinging from its breach, she took a deep breath in and out.

Then she lunged at her guards. With cold efficiency she snapped the smaller one's neck, grabbing his weapon she shot the other one. Dropping to a knee she took the other's weapon as well, stepping over their bodies she felt nothing.

Running through the halls she felt something tugging at her consciousness, eventually she found what appeared to be a lab, with a young female replicator inside. Silently she snuck into the room, pressing her weapon against the other's back she demanded," where is the jumper bay?"

The young woman spun around, "I felt you in the collective."

"Where is the jumper bay!"

"Oberoth will never let you leave here."

"Where is the jumper bay," Elizabeth demanded as she pressed the other gun now against the woman's head.

"Why are you so determined to leave us? You can never return to Atlantis, you are one of us."

"I may not be human, but I am not one of you," spat Elizabeth as she then struck her hand into the other woman's head. As she saw images of a ship flying by her, Elizabeth tried to focus on that image, her concentration was broken by the heavy thuds of other's approaching the door. Sensing the Asuran preparing to summon the guards, Elizabeth killed her as she had her guards. Taking no chances though Elizabeth dragged the Asuran's body behind a control council that was in the corner.

Quickly she dashed into the adjoining lab, as the door swished closed, she heard the door into the room beginning to open. Only able to wait and hope that the guards left quickly without discovering the body or herself, she clasping both guns to her breast, prepared to fight her way out if necessary. She only could hear their footsteps through the door five in, and they stopped. Praying that they didn't move any further into the room, Elizabeth inched her finger towards the trigger of the Asuran weapon. After what seemed to be an eternity and the still the guards hadn't moved, until their footsteps once again began only soon to be followed by the swoosh of the door opening and then closing behind them.

When she was sure that they had left and were not coming back did Elizabeth exit the lab, with her weapon drawn. In the main room there was only the Asuran she had killed whose dead eyes were staring directly at her, just like Miguel never had.

Once again Elizabeth ran, only now she knew where she was going.

_**19 Years Ago**_

_Her parents had agreed to met her, at one of the more renowned restaurants in New York. Elizabeth had arrived early to ensure that the reservations were in fact made, and to prepare herself for the ensuing confrontation. When she saw her father's BMW pull into the parking lot she impulsively ran a hand through her hair and straightened her skirt. The door burst open and her father strode through it, his very presence demanding everyone's attention. Her mother was on his arm, elegant, with not a single hair out of place, as she opened her arms to lightly embrace her daughter. They looked like a perfect family._

_Elizabeth contented herself with small talk, what her university was like, the clubs she was involved in, and yes she was content in a dorm. By the time they were halfway done with their meal, which her mother had deemed acceptable, the words that she had been preparing herself to say for the past three days spilled from her lips. "I've changed my major."_

_Her mother's normal control over her facial expressions vanished shock clearly on her face. Gradually her shock gave way to one of resigned disappointment. "I thought we agreed that you would go to medical school, dear."_

"_No, mother. You decided I would be a doctor," was Elizabeth's sharp reply._

_Her father's gruff voice broke the ensuing silence."What is your new major?"_

"_Political science. I was thinking maybe I could do some lobbying work after I graduate."_

"_Why on God's green earth do you want to be a paper pushing pansy who makes nothing?" he demanded._

_A resolute look came over Elizabeth's face. With a cold finality in her eyes, she said. "There are some things that are more important than money. After all, someone has to fix the mess the rest of you make of the world."_

The hallway to the jumper bay was deserted. Before she ventured into it though she carefully hid her weapons under her shirt, easily accessible but not visible, with a small measure of comfort she allowed her hand to rest on them. Taking a deep breath she calmly strode out into the hallway and whisked into the bay.

Inside there was a small group of Asurans clustered around one jumper, appearing to read a data pad. They were indifferent to her presence, having only sensed another Asuran enter the room, still she quickly made her way past them and into a jumper on the far end of the bay.

A small hint of worry entered her brain, as to how she would fly the ship when she didn't have the Ancient gene, but on entering she discovered her fear misplaced as the ship came to life. The Asurans weren't the Ancients, she didn't need the gene as long as she had nanites. Silencing her mind to the other thoughts dashing it, she focused her entire energy on flying the ship, as she settled herself in the pilots chair. Hatch sealed, the ship began to rise.

As she neared the edge of the city, she felt Oberoth tugging at the corner's of her mind. His anger at her departure, his ordering others to follow her. She felt the others closing behind her, urging her ship on faster, she could make out the Stargate on the horizon. And the other ships could now make her out on their horizon as well, as she was now forced to dodge weapons fire as well.

Dialing the gate, she instinctively began to reach for Atlantis' address. Abruptly she stopped herself and chose another planet, one that was inhabitable. The event horizon burst from the gate, as she was about to enter it, she was jarred as one of the Asuran's weapons hit her jumper; she heard Oberoth announce to the others that she had been killed in her escape, and with that she left the planet behind her.

_**9 Years Ago**_

_Walking into the UN ,Elizabeth stopped. She spent some time just looking at the bustle of people around her, allowing the various languages to surround her like a wave. Taking a deep breath she made her way to the elevator and pressed the up button._

_She became a diplomat to put reunite the countries that had been divided by war, hunger, hardship, external pressures, greed, hatred. To many people's surprise, she succeeded where many had failed. They called her dedicated, single-minded in her focus, and brilliant. She simply knew that she had never been able to stand division, and she never would._

Exiting the jumper, she gazed at the desolate landscape, already taking note of where she would need to install defenses. Sighing, she turned back to the jumper, she could only hear the female replicator's voice saying, "you can never go home again."

Grudgingly, Elizabeth murmured, "This is home."

_**Present Date**_

_In all her life the last thing Elizabeth ever expected to not be able to put back together was herself._

_**A/N: This story was written for the prompt Elizabeth/Divide. A huge thanks has to go out to my wonderful beta lears_daughter whose sense for detail made this story infinitely better, and she helped translate it from brain into English. Any remaining mistakes are solely my own. And comments are love! :D**_


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